Tired of the zombie apocalypse, yet? I know, it’s been done to death. No one’s buying into the idea anymore, really. It’s kind of like getting fruit cake for Christmas from your favorite aunt. I mean, it’s really good fruit cake, but you’ve had it since you were 5. Also, she has Alzheimer’s and the stigmata. She speaks in tongues, but she means well.
It’s getting close to that time of the month again, and this is the season where we enjoy blood from unknown orifices!
Yes! It’s almost Halloween, and Techland has a pretty sweet offer for us horror fans! You can play it below! It’s an interactive story on Youtube. It’s kind of like one of those old “Choose Your Own Adventure” books that we had as kids, but my adventures always ended with me naked in a tub of Jello next to Swedish bikini models. Look, if I’m going to choose my own adventure, I’d rather be surrounded in booty plundered through long escapades in the end.
Hellraid is Techland’s new project, and it looks pretty awesome! There will be both single and multi-player campaigns that will have a uniquely generated gameplay experience for each playthrough, which adds a HUGE amount of replay value. The developers at Techland are calling their new pet the Game Master, inspired by pen and paper RPG’s with interwoven plots and stories created by your friends in a circle of sad nerds arguing over semantics while consuming Mountain Dew and Doritos.
There will be prototypical skill trees for each class, but Techland isn’t going to hold your hand the entire way. Weapons and magic are interchangeable between them, so you can build your character any way you want if you can find the right equipment. They’re trying to build a game engine that allows for a lot more freedom for the players! Look, I’m so excited! It’s 100 degrees out and my nipples are so hard right now, they’re practically milkable!