Kenneth Ellis

All the lights are down. The streamers are falling off the walls, and the DJ has officially packed up his gear. E3 (a.k.a. “Prom” for this metaphor) is over. Now we’re all in the parking lot, going over all the events of the night. Remember that guy, who showed up drunk, jumped up on stage and air guitared the solo from AC/DC’s Back in Black ? That was good times…

Well, no it wasn’t, because right before that, he had just air-soloed Through the Fire and the Flames. So in retrospect, no, it was NOT good times. Square-Enix is “that guy” and they showed up to E3 drunk on their own pretentiousness.

Yes yes yes, I know E3 is the place where you are supposed to showcase your new games and IPs. I get that, but some people need to know when to hang back and let things mature a little bit before they flood the market with bullshit. Those people are Square-Enix. Why pick on them? Because they are being stupid, and so by association is Final Fantasy 14: Online.

Square is squandering not one, but TWO of their OWN games with this Final Fantasy 14 stuff.  The first is Final Fantasy 13 (all three of them) which is not coming out for almost a year. Hell, I doubt Brady Games has even finished the first draft of their walk-through for it. The second is Final Fantasy XI. Do you remember that little MMO? I’m trying not to, but if I want to live in reality, I have to admit that game exists.  I guess Square doesn’t though, because they are about to pull an EverQuest.

The problem here is timing. Why announce this now? Square is literally dividing its own consumer base among its own products. Lets say there is a farmer, and this farmer grows apples. These apples are known the world over and everyone loves them. One day the farmer announces that the new crop of apples is ready and that they are really special this season.  You–whilst reading your Apple Aficionado quarterly–come across this news and already start planning all your wonderful pies and jams. Suddenly, the farmer makes a new announcement. He was secretly growing a second crop of new apples and that THOSE apples will be coming soon to a produce store strangely close to when the original new apples were supposed to come out. Now what do you do? You were already looking forward to the first new apples and you’re still not really done with your old apples either! I hope you like apples! [Enough with the apple metaphor, already. --Chris]

In this economy, as it stands right now, Square is basically forcing some people to choose between FF13 and FF14. Even some people who would have gladly purchased both, had Square just waited a bit on the next game. They are making some bad business decisions right now. The Ps3 “exclusivity” of FF14 was weird enough (though we all know that’s crazy talk), but couple that with another consumer-dividing announcement and you’re sure-fire going to lose money somewhere. What about ol’ FF11? Are they going to keep the FF11 servers running when FF14 releases? Probably, and that’s when the real trouble will start. Does anyone recall a little game called EverQuest? I do. I remember it being SUPER popular and having a large user base. Then the creators of EverQuest did the expected and made EverQuest 2, but they failed to shut down the first EverQuest. Soooo, what happened then? The two games, made and released by the same company, were competing against themselves. Users either stayed with the old EQ or went to the new EQ. But very few did BOTH, so the two games dwindled and died due to the existence of the other one. This was before WoW and the MMO explosion, so the only other MMORPG out there was Ultima Online and Nothing. Now Square wants to do pretty much the same thing, in an industry with heavy competition and under the looming shadow of WoW. Good Luck.

The last thing I want to mention is that the Final Fantasy Roman Numeral comes with an inherent understanding. That that Numeral signifies a defined, fixed point. That it is a chapter of a long saga and will tell a story. A story that Ends. That it concludes and a new chapter will begin. It is a fact that, unless your tale involves a Luck Dragon, it’s going to come to some kind of endpoint. MMOs, on the other hand, do not end, as well they shouldn’t, but putting a roman numeral on the end of a Final Fantasy ( I feel) erodes something from Final Fantasy over all. Whats wrong with just; Final Fantasy: Online?

Rant Done. Go about your lives as normal.

[Disclaimer: Whew, those were some inflammatory opinions! Did this Rant infuriate you? Want to enlighten us as to the extent of our stupidity? Let us know in the comments, Mr. Grumpypants!]